It’s finally starting to warm up down here at the bottom of the globe (though even as I write this, sitting outside in the sunshine on the warm grass, tomorrow will be raining, cold and there won’t be any sunshine). Regardless, the warm weather brings hope that spring time is finally coming, and the song birds prophetically begin to call the songs of spring as if they were solely responsible for calling forth of what is coming but has not arrived yet. Hope brings with it the expectation that what was promised, will again be made whole, and the farmer looks towards the horizon for those expected spring rains. The whole delight has got me thinking about tomorrow as well.
Although I look forward to tomorrow, and by tomorrow I mean the fulfilment of those promises that have plagued me through a long winter of waiting, with it comes anxiety and fear about the unknown. Let me explain.
I have shared throughout this year writing, that I looked forward to what God promised years ago. I was where I needed to be, and there was peace in that, but being home was not the only dream I had. I had dreams to follow Jesus – no matter what that looked like – and although being ‘home’ was right, it wasn’t forever. Then, along with the song of the birds, the atmosphere shifted and I looked up with expectation towards that horizon.
Suddenly though, like a cold southerly wind, I found myself filled with self doubt, fear and anxiety about what that ‘sunrise’ would look like. Is this really it Jesus? Did you really speak? What if this isn’t what you are saying, and I get it all wrong? What if I stuff this all up?
That’s when I felt the Holy Spirit remind me over a few weeks of some very important truths I had forgotten.
I had a dream to follow the Lord, no matter what that looked like. I earnestly looked towards Him for guidance and through prayer I asked Jesus to make the ‘next step’ clear that I was hearing from him.
But when I got the ‘green light’, did I need to have all the answers? Absolutely not. Could I get it wrong? Sort of. If I heard from Him, and ignored the call like Jonah did, and freely choose to walk the other way, that is disobedience, and therefore NOT what God calls us to. But if I trusted that He would provide the way (Proverbs 3: 5-6; Jeremiah 29:11), that (Psalm 46:5) he would not let me fall, that he would guide me where I needed to go (Proverbs 16:9), be always with me (Joshua 1:9) and would speak when I needed Him to, then did I really ever need to be afraid?
We are not our own Sculptor, not our own god, not the Writer of our destiny. I think it’s important to remember we are creation, not Creator. Therefore despite what the world screams, it is almost counter-biblical to be your own master. To build your own life, to make yourself great, to serve your own purpose – is not what we as Christians are called to do.
The Bible says that we are called to Trust and be Obedient (Deuteronomy 5:33; 2 John 1:6; 2 Samuel 7:28; Daniel 6:23), to learn to love the Lord with all our heart and all our soul and all our strength. (Deuteronomy 6:5; Matthew 22:37,38). When we are working towards this truth and living in harmony with it, all the other things we worry about become meaningless.
So can I get it wrong and miss out on what God has for me?
I think we can get it wrong, but I don’t think it disqualifies us from Gods plan like that. I am convinced, and the Bible testifies to this, that God uses those ‘mistakes’ failures, wrong turns, tears and fears, to grow our trust in Him. It teaches us that as humans we fall short, but there is hope that in Jesus there can be reconciliation, peace and destiny. On our own we are weak, but with Christ we are strong (2 Corinthians 12:10).
We do not need to worry, because God has provided everything we need, even if it’s simply peace that tomorrow will be ok (Matthew 6:25-34).
And just like that, the sun lifts from the horizon, and the fears along with the darkness flee from me. I look up now, and a magpie flies past carrying the branch he will add to the nest he is preparing in the tree, under which I sit today to write.
Suddenly I am reminded again that part of ‘waiting’ on the promises that will arrive tomorrow, is the preparation of self today.
I have no doubt that in perfect timing, I will hear the Lord speak. And I need not be afraid. As Scripture has reminded me today, I don’t need to be the one in control of what it all looks like. I just need to prepare my nest today. That means trusting, loving, hoping in Jesus, with all my heart and soul and might, right here today, and where ever I find myself tomorrow.
Listen you who doubt, listen you who feel inadequate, listen up you who fear!
Spring is coming. Prepare your nests for the promised ‘eggs’ that He will provide.
Something exciting is coming, the barren women will dance.
Now throw off your fear as if it were an entangling net and fly freely into the Hope of Jesus Christ.
Come now, let us join in the song of the birds that calls forth the Springtime. I will praise and dance completely undignified, filled with hope once again.
Sing, Dance, Hope, completely free.